030. Having a Life Plan and How to Ignore It

January is coming to an end, and it reminds me of my New Year's Resolutions. It's only (or already) been one month, so where am I at with my goals? Where are you at with yours?

At the beginning of the year, I set out on a quest to find balance within the emotional, daunting, confusing and often turbulent waters of being self-employed.

Sadly this required doing something I hate. Getting a full understanding of my money situation (what comes in vs. what goes out). I would like to point out that I'm an artist first, and a business person last. I'm trying to fix this balance but it will definitely take time.

I recently came across this concept of "Your Life in Weeks."
(more info here: http://waitbutwhy.com/2014/05/life-weeks.html)

To my horror, I realized I'm over 25% through with my life (if I'm lucky and live to be 90).

After taking a few deep breaths, I decided to look at it a different way (I do in fact have a morbid fascination with this topic). Here's me, in calendar form:

The green zone represents time I've lived, that I can never change or get back.

Rather than let the weight of this reality crush me or make me spiral into a panic and feel rushed to accomplish all my hopes and dreams TODAY... I stopped and looked at the facts.

Most of that green area was childhood, adolescence, schooling, and figuring out who I was as a person.

I'm now living the life I always dreamed of. I know who I am and what I want. And I'm only 31.

OK, whew. Got that out of the way. Now I can focus on making a PLAN!

I am the type of person who get's really excited by making detailed plans, and then forgets about them.
My goals are always in the back of my mind, but I rarely stick to a strict plan to achieve them.
I make things up as I go, live in the moment, and follow my instincts.
The pleasure I get from making the plan is akin to drinking a wonderful glass of wine. Feels good in the moment, but it never lasts.

But in facing the truth, now I know some things. I know for the next 18 years I need to make monthly student loan payments (If I continue paying the minimum amount). I know that each spring I need to pay exorbitant amount of self-employment taxes. And I estimate I have about 48 years left to live.

Other that that, I'm FREE, right!? 
Well not quite. I also have to pay rent, utilities, buy food...
Ok so I'm stuck in the system.

We live in a money-driven society. We need money to live.

That is a depressing thought for someone who simply wants to create beautiful art, spread joy, and see the the wonders of nature.

So it comes down to choice.

I CHOOSE to be part of the system (the alternative is sell everything I own, be homeless, declare bankruptcy and start over).
I CHOOSE make art, try to spread joy and inspiration, and help people when I can.
I CHOOSE to focus on the positive. 

I'll keep my Life Calendar in the back of my mind as I go, but I will focus on those blank squares. There is so much potential..so much possibility in the unknown. 

Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. - John Lennon

What's your plan?